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Posts Tagged ‘Brett Favre Retirement’

Lando’s Playoff Punditry

January 20th, 2010 by Lando | 2 Comments | Filed in Playoffs

The headache is creeping up.

To even think that Brett Favre and Mark Sanchez are one game away from playing each other in the Super Bowl…. Gah it makes me shudder.  I would refuse to watch this game sober.  Both are so not deserving of even playing in the Super Bowl.  I would rather see both of them wrestling naked than watch them play in the superest of bowls.  Shoot me now.

On a random note I think Kurt Warner is feeling a bit like Brendan(Brenden? What’s the official spelling on this?  It’s like the name Brittany.  Just come up with one spelling.  We’re white.  Come on.) Fraser in the box office smash hit Bedazzled.  For those of you who don’t know the movie Fraser sells his soul to the devil for five wishes, but each wish he makes becomes a hell in some way, shape, or form.  Something always goes horribly wrong.  And this is exactly what’s happened to Warner.  And I’m loving it.  First good ole Kurt sells his soul to regain his lost powers.  He takes the Cardinals to the Super Bowl and almost wins.  Almost.  Than this year he starts coming down to earth again, and gets blindsided trying to chase down an interception.  Knocked out of the game.  Fucking classic.  I love it.  Who called here on T-Rac’s Posse?  That’s right. Me, baby. Me.

Alright let’s review these games.

AFC

New York at Indianapolis:  How in the hell did the Jets make it this far?  Oh, San Diego remembered why Norv Turner blows and the Bengals just aren’t that good.  Gah I wish the Titans last year had been so lucky.  Well I’m going to come right out and say that the Colts are going to stick it in and break it off.  Airaser I’m with you on this one buddy.  Please kill Mark Sanchez.

Big Games:

  • Peyton Manning:  The man is a god.  There is nothing he can do wrong.  This is his year blah blah blah.  I get really sick of hearing it, but I can’t deny the truth.  The guy is a straight up G.  And I’m really cheering for you this week man.  Send the Jets packing and I will sacrifice to you.
  • Reggie Wayne:  I’m convinced he can catch anything.  I think the trainer’s apply some kind of adhesive to his gloves because that guy pulls EVERYTHING down.  If the Island shuts him down then some other Colts receiver is going to be wide open.  Probably the Mormon.
  • Gary Brackett:  If I was playing a backyard football game with all the NFL players to choose from this is how it would go.  #1 Chris Johns0n, #2 Randy Moss, #3 the great Gary Brackett.

Bad Uns:

  • Mark “Gay” Sanchez:  FUCK.  YOU.
  • The Jets:  Please.  The Titans don’t make the playoffs but you do.  And what’s worse is that people are actually giving you guys credit like you did something.  The last two teams you played in the regular season rolled over and died.  Just remember that, douches from New York.  You drafted Vernon Gholston.  Come on.

HAHAHHAHAHAHAHA DIE WARNER HAHAHAHAHAHA

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PosseCast: Brett Favre and the misery of Cleveland

August 20th, 2009 by Rogersworthe | No Comments | Filed in PosseCasts

So I am joined by Lando, our fantasy expert, and our most recurring guest Andrew from Los Angeles. We discuss Brett Favre, the pitiful nature of the Cleveland Browns, PETA and its stupidity, and the weirdness of NFL Players owning Car Washes.

This one came out well and is quite funny. It helps we all hate Brett Favre and love making fun of him. If you enjoy this also, THEN DEFINITELY LISTEN!

However, if you love Brett Favre, then stop reading my site you asshole. Also don’t listen to this.

Click here to subscribe with iTunes

Click here to subscribe with Zune or other RSS/XML Feed Reader

Click here to download .mp3 file

And, as always, you can listen here on our podcast page or listen streaming from the media player below.

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Lightspeed Links: PLEASE DON’T BE TRUE

August 17th, 2009 by Rogersworthe | No Comments | Filed in Lightspeed Links

This is a recent article by Jay Glazer of Fox Sports. I now want to stab myself in the eye. If this is true, I will be tempted to set myself on fire in protest. JUST RETIRE ALREADY YOU DOUCHE!!!!

I HATE YOU!!!!!

I HATE YOU!!!!!

See, on this Favre issue, his defenders (which include 95% of ESPN, Peter King, Peter King wannabes, Wrangler, his 3rd cousin on Twitter, and any analyst who is white and played in the NFL before), say “What is the problem with someone wanting to keep playing?” I’m okay with that. I don’t care if an athlete plays until his arms drop off. I was fine with Jerry Rice playing until nobody would even allow him on their team. BUT HE DIDN’T CLAIM TO BE RETIRED 12 TIMES IN THE PROCESS!!! Favre essentially doesn’t want to go to Camp or work hard at his job. He wants to show up on gameday and start slingin’ it, have the home crowd cheer him, and ESPN fawn all over his every move. But the thing is, you can’t win a damn Superbowl that way. It isn’t going to happen. The closest he has come in recent years was his last year in Green Bay in which he did all the right things like study film and try to not throw interceptions. THey came up short. Since then, it seems his attitude has become “I tried winning a Superbowl THEIR way, now I am gonna do it MY way!!” Then he gave false hope before he then firebombed the Jets.

He won’t make it through a whole season Minnesota. And from what I can tell on your blogs and such, you know that. You know that this is a beleaguered coach trying to save his job. But you’re stuck with it anyways. Meanwhile, NFC North games will attributed meaning that isn’t actually there. ESPN will break down his performance at least once every NFL Live show.  And more and more people will continue to hate him, until a very select, ver ignorant few will still like Brett Favre. And I think he deserves every bit of that hate.

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Brett Favre is staying retired and Media continues in worship

July 28th, 2009 by Rogersworthe | 3 Comments | Filed in Media Failures, Rest of the NFL

Many reports are coming out now saying that Brett Favre is staying retired. Whatever. Not really a big news story. But the worship of him and defense of him by the Media is continuing on. Already, Chris Mortensen, who I actually like, tweeted (or twatted, however you say it) this: “Yes we have confirmed Brett staying retired. Good decision. Remember without Vikings’ interest, never would have been a story.”

Bullshit.

He is obviously trying to defend Favre pre-emptively with that line that starts with “Remember”. That’s total bullshit, and I fully expect the Favre-loving contingent in the media to take this line. Mortensen, Peter King, Colin Cowherd, everybody else on ESPN, I’m sure a few on NFLN which I don’t get and have never seen. They’ll all take this line. And I am warning you, it’s bullshit.

Don't be fooled. Favre is the master of media manipulation and a gloryhound.

Don't be fooled. Favre is the master of media manipulation and a gloryhound.

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Brett Favre is Retiring! This is HUGE News!

February 11th, 2009 by Rogersworthe | No Comments | Filed in Rest of the NFL

So, if you go to espn.com right now you will see the big news of Brett Favre retiring! This is so big! I mean, it’s even made the cover of a tiny little Titans fan blog it’s so big! I can’t believe He is retiring!

A man named J.J. Jones (doucheville) sums it up best: “Whether this is the final answer or not, thank you Brett for the 17 great years and for coming back for at least the one with the Jets. It was well worth it to see you under center again, regardless of the team.”

He’s completely right. God knows I enjoyed watching him divebomb his team from 1st to out of the playoffs while throwing 132 Interceptions. It was exhilarating! HE’S SUCH A GUNSLINGER!!!! HE’S SO OLD SCHOOL!!! TREDUCKEN!!!

Of course, there are Favre haters out there, but an espn.com profile user named Proscia-Vin (possibly the most amazing name ever devised for a profile. I mean it’s so good, I don’t even know what the hell it means) put those Favre haters and their haterade to rest: “All you people are Favre haters, He should jsut play out this last year of his contract and retire at age 40, He is still in the top 10 of Quarterbacks in the league maybe top 5, but he plays the game the way it should be played, and INTS happen so he can add to that record to because all you haters criticize on that the most but he has 5 other records that take away that INT record… He is one of the best quarterbacks to play this game.”

I mean, how true. Who cares if he led the league in INT’s this year? As we Titans fans know, A high amount of INT’s by a QB does not affect a record in the NFL by much at all. We did go 10-6 with Vince Young throwing 18 picks, and when that stringy old gray-haired veteran Kerry Collins came in and threw 11 less interceptions, we only won 3 more games. I mean, what are 3 games? The Kansas City Royals win 60 a year in baseball!

Heck, Gene Wojciechowski said it best when he wrote in his ingenuously titled article NFL not the same without Brett Favre : “The NFL isn’t going to be the same without Favre — and how many players can you say that about? More than each of his records, that’s the Favre legacy that counts.”

Indeed, Gene. Indeed. I agree, it is very important to focus on this very vague idea of the legacy of one of the 50 greatest Americans than to actually look at his career and realize that he had just as many talented teams as John Elway and Tom Brady and yet only made 2 Superbowls while winning only one against a vastly inferior team. This vague idea of his legacy as God’s gift to the NFL really is a better way to look at things because otherwise one might notice he has thrown more interceptions than ANYBODY EVER. I mean, this vague idea saves us from the reality that he has spent more of his career being Tony Romo than, well, Tony Romo. Luckily Favre’s wife never got fat, she just got cancer.

So, Brett, from T-Rac’s Posse we wish you good luck as you become a Mississippi Land Baron in the rich tradition of the days of yore as the NFL becomes the most boring pro sports league in the world without your presence and your interceptions and your false modesty as you gunsling your way to a 9-7 record while being paid $13 Million. It’s not like Tavaris Jackson could go 9-7 or anything.

So long, Brett. We’ll miss you. On a related note, this blog is now going to cover the Nashville Sounds since nobody would ever want to read an NFL blog without Brett in the league. We’ll be back with a breakdown of the Pacific Coast League right after I figure out what that means.

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